Our Purpose
There are some fundamental things we need to consider before having children. These are: finding the father of our children and getting married; becoming pregnant and giving birth; and finally, what it means to be a mother.
Marriage is not just for the fulfilment of desires. One of our primary objectives as Muslims is to increase the progeny of the ummah and we do this by birthing children and raising them with the affirmation of the oneness of Allah (S.W.A).
أَخْبَرَنَا عَبْدُ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنُ خَالِدٍ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ بْنُ هَارُونَ، قَالَ أَنْبَأَنَا الْمُسْتَلِمُ بْنُ سَعِيدٍ، عَنْ مَنْصُورِ بْنِ زَاذَانَ، عَنْ مُعَاوِيَةَ بْنِ قُرَّةَ، عَنْ مَعْقِلِ بْنِ يَسَارٍ، قَالَ جَاءَ رَجُلٌ إِلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَقَالَ إِنِّي أَصَبْتُ امْرَأَةً ذَاتَ حَسَبٍ وَمَنْصِبٍ إِلاَّ أَنَّهَا لاَ تَلِدُ أَفَأَتَزَوَّجُهَا فَنَهَاهُ ثُمَّ أَتَاهُ الثَّانِيَةَ فَنَهَاهُ ثُمَّ أَتَاهُ الثَّالِثَةَ فَنَهَاهُ فَقَالَ “ تَزَوَّجُوا الْوَلُودَ الْوَدُودَ فَإِنِّي مُكَاثِرٌ بِكُمْ ” .
It was narrated that Ma’qil bin Yasar said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allah and said: ‘I have found a woman who is from a good family and of good status, but she does not bear children, should I marry her?’ He told him not to. Then he came to him a second time and he told him not to (marry her). Then he came to him a third time and he told him not to (marry her), then he said: ‘Marry the one who is fertile and loving, for I will boast of your great numbers.'” : (Sunan an-Nasa’i 3227; Book 26, Hadith 32)
يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ قُوٓا۟ أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًۭا وَقُودُهَا ٱلنَّاسُ وَٱلْحِجَارَةُ عَلَيْهَا مَلَـٰٓئِكَةٌ غِلَاظٌۭ شِدَادٌۭ لَّا يَعْصُونَ ٱللَّهَ مَآ أَمَرَهُمْ وَيَفْعَلُونَ مَا يُؤْمَرُونَ
“O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allāh in what He commands them but do what they are commanded” (At-Tahrim 66:6)
حَدَّثَنَا عَارِمٌ، قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا حَمَّادُ بْنُ زَيْدٍ، عَنْ أَيُّوبَ، عَنْ نَافِعٍ، عَنِ ابْنِ عُمَرَ قَالَ: قَالَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم: كُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ، وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْؤولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ، فَالأَمِيرُ رَاعٍ وَهُوَ مَسْؤُولٌ، وَالرَّجُلُ رَاعٍ عَلَى أَهْلِهِ وَهُوَ مَسْؤُولٌ، وَالْمَرْأَةُ رَاعِيَةٌ عَلَى بَيْتِ زَوْجِهَا وَهِيَ مَسْؤُولَةٌ، أَلاَ وَكُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ، وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْؤُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ.
Ibn ‘Umar reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, “All of you are shepherds and each of you is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of the people of his house and he is responsible. A woman is the shepherd of the house of her husband and she is responsible. Each of you is a shepherd and each is responsible for his flock” (Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 212; Book 10, Hadith 1).
