It’s been four years since we shared our article, ‘A Muslima’s Guide to Social Media Etiquette’. As technology evolves and online interactions become more integral to daily life, it’s essential to revisit and expand our understanding of how to navigate social media mindfully and ethically within the shariah framework. Whether you’re reconnecting with old friends or sharing personal milestones, let’s explore updated guidelines to ensure that our online presence reflects our values and beliefs.
As you may have noticed, Muslima Guide is no longer active on social media. The personal nature of social media channels often leads to exposure to unfiltered and potentially distracting content, which wasn’t an environment we felt aligned with our values. However, the future may hold possibilities for a dedicated team to manage social media outreach for Muslima Guide, ensuring a consistent and purposeful approach for dawah work.
Now let’s explore the much-anticipated continuation of our guide on social media etiquette for active users. In part two, we will delve deeper into best practices, respectful interactions, and maintaining a positive online presence.
Maintaining Modesty in Online Interactions:
Modesty, or hayaa, is an essential part of our deen, and it must extend to our online interactions as well. This isn’t just about the images and videos we post but also about the language and tone we use. Avoid using language that can be disrespectful or inflammatory, as it doesn’t align with the manners of a Muslima. Let’s break this down:
Thoughtful Image Sharing
When posting images, make sure that you uphold the principles of modesty. Remember, once shared online, images can be hard to get rid of and may be seen by unintended audiences. It’s crucial that you’re mindful of others’ privacy too. Always seek permission before sharing their images, especially if the content is private. Don’t expose others by compromising their modesty.
Addressing Sexualization
There is such a heightened focus on appearance in today’s world so it’s very important to remember that our online presence should reflect our values. Avoid images or videos that might be perceived as sexualizing yourself. This includes avoiding tight or revealing clothing, and being cautious about poses and expressions. Remember, our bodies are a trust from Allah, and they should be respected and shielded from unnecessary exposure.
وَقُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنَـٰتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَـٰرِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا ۖ وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَىٰ جُيُوبِهِنَّ ۖ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ ءَابَآئِهِنَّ أَوْ ءَابَآءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَآئِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَآءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ إِخْوَٰنِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِىٓ إِخْوَٰنِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِىٓ أَخَوَٰتِهِنَّ أَوْ نِسَآئِهِنَّ أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَـٰنُهُنَّ أَوِ ٱلتَّـٰبِعِينَ غَيْرِ أُو۟لِى ٱلْإِرْبَةِ مِنَ ٱلرِّجَالِ أَوِ ٱلطِّفْلِ ٱلَّذِينَ لَمْ يَظْهَرُوا۟ عَلَىٰ عَوْرَٰتِ ٱلنِّسَآءِ ۖ وَلَا يَضْرِبْنَ بِأَرْجُلِهِنَّ لِيُعْلَمَ مَا يُخْفِينَ مِن زِينَتِهِنَّ ۚ وَتُوبُوٓا۟ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ جَمِيعًا أَيُّهَ ٱلْمُؤْمِنُونَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ ٣١
“And tell the believing women to reduce their vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment except that which [necessarily] appears thereof and to wrap [a portion of] their headcovers over their chests and not expose their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands’ fathers, their sons, their husbands’ sons, their brothers, their brothers’ sons, their sisters’ sons, their women, that which their right hands possess, or those male attendants having no physical desire, or children who are not yet aware of the private aspects of women. And let them not stamp their feet to make known what they conceal of their adornment. And turn to Allah in repentance, all of you, O believers, that you might succeed.”
An-Nur, 24:31
This highlights the importance of guarding modesty, including wearing hijab and ensuring that our “body” remain private, seen only by those permissible (mahram). When interacting online, it’s crucial to avoid posting sexualized images and to maintain the essence of modesty in our virtual presence.
The Choice to Wear Hijab Online
I know many cases of Muslim women consistently wearing the physical hijab in their daily lives, but not so on social media. Where there are varying opinions among scholars on whether the niqab is mandatory, there is a consensus that the hijab is obligatory. When sharing images or videos, it’s important to reflect on whether they align with your beliefs about hijab and modesty. Maintaining your hijab online, just as you do in your day-to-day life, not only honours your deen, but also sets a positive example for other Muslim women who may look up to you.
Be Cautious with Makeup
While wearing makeup isn’t prohibited, the way it’s used online should reflect the principles of modesty. Avoid heavy or attention-drawing makeup that might be seen as contradictory to modesty. Balance is key; subtlety can often be more impactful and is in line with maintaining the natural beauty Allah has blessed you with. Remember, your presence on social media doesn’t need to be for the approval of non-mahram or casual followers. If you’re seeking a husband, it’s important to start on the right path and guard yourself from potential sins. Let your actions resonate with your true values, as tomorrow is never guaranteed.
Online Personas: Avoiding Loud and Unfiltered Behaviour
Sometimes, there is a trend of creating loud and unfiltered content using foul language even when wearing a hijab and representing Islam. Remember that as a Muslima, your behaviour both offline and online serves as a representation of our deen. Content full of foul language, overly aggressive tones, or inappropriate jokes can give a wrong impression, and you’re sinning. Remember that everything you share online reflects your values and can influence others. By choosing to post dignified, respectful, and beneficial content, you avoid sin and encourage positive behaviour and remain mindful of what is halal.
Honouring Our Muslima Identity
Another trend we often see online is skits involving women dressed as men or vice versa, portraying behaviors associated with the opposite gender. This might include wearing men’s clothing, drawing on beards or adopting a manly demeanour. This blurs the lines by going against our deen.
حَدَّثَنَا مَحْمُودُ بْنُ غَيْلاَنَ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو دَاوُدَ الطَّيَالِسِيُّ، حَدَّثَنَا شُعْبَةُ، وَهَمَّامٌ، عَنْ قَتَادَةَ، عَنْ عِكْرِمَةَ، عَنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ، قَالَ لَعَنَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم الْمُتَشَبِّهَاتِ بِالرِّجَالِ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ وَالْمُتَشَبِّهِينَ بِالنِّسَاءِ مِنَ الرِّجَالِ . قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ صَحِيحٌ .
Narrated Ibn ‘Abbas: “The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) cursed the women who imitate men and the men who imitate women.”
Jami` at-Tirmidhi 2784
Chapter 34: What Has Been Related About Women Who Imitate Men, Book 43: Chapters on Manners
Ultimately, our online presence should be a reflection of our inner values and faith.
Avoiding Gossip, Backbiting, and Slander:
Gossip (Gheebah), backbiting, and slander (Namimah) are highly discouraged acts in the deen. Both the Quran and Hadith provide explicit guidance on this:
Quran:
يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ ٱجْتَنِبُوا۟ كَثِيرًۭا مِّنَ ٱلظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ ٱلظَّنِّ إِثْمٌۭ ۖ وَلَا تَجَسَّسُوا۟ وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا ۚ أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًۭا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ ۚ وَٱتَّقُوا۟ ٱللَّهَ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ تَوَّابٌۭ رَّحِيمٌۭ ١٢
O believers! Avoid many suspicions, ˹for˺ indeed, some suspicions are sinful. And do not spy, nor backbite one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of their dead brother? You would despise that! And fear Allah. Surely Allah is ˹the˺ Accepter of Repentance, Most Merciful.
Al-Hujurat 49:12
Hadith:
وعن أبي هريرة رضي الله عنه أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: “أتدرون ما الغيبة؟” قالوا: الله ورسوله أعلم قال: ”ذكرك أخاك بما يكره” قيل: أفرأيت إن كان في أخي ما أقول؟ قال: ”إن كان فيه ما تقول، فقد اغتبته، وإن لم يكن فيه ما تقول فقد بهته”. ((رواه مسلم)).
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “Do you know what is backbiting?” The Companions said: “Allah and His Messenger know better.” Thereupon he said, “Backbiting is talking about your (Muslim) brother in a manner which he dislikes.” It was said to him: “What if my (Muslim) brother is as I say.” He said, “If he is actually as you say, then that is backbiting; but if that is not in him, that is slandering.” [Muslim].
Riyad as-Salihin 1523
Chapter 254: The Prohibition of Backbiting and the Commandment of Guarding one’s Tongue, Book 17: The Book of the Prohibited actions
حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ اللهِ بْنُ صَالِحٍ قَالَ: حَدَّثَنِي مُعَاوِيَةُ بْنُ صَالِحٍ، عَنْ كَثِيرِ بْنِ الْحَارِثِ، عَنِ الْقَاسِمِ بْنِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ الشَّامِيِّ، سَمِعْتُ ابْنَ أُمِّ عَبْدٍ يَقُولُ: مَنِ اغْتِيبَ عِنْدَهُ مُؤْمِنٌ فَنَصَرهُ جَزَاهُ اللَّهُ بِهَا خَيْرًا فِي الدُّنْيَا وَالْآخِرَةِ، وَمَنِ اغْتِيبَ عِنْدَهُ مُؤْمِنٌ فَلَمْ يَنْصُرْهُ جَزَاهُ اللَّهُ بِهَا فِي الدُّنْيَا وَالْآخِرَةِ شَرًّا، وَمَا الْتَقَمَ أَحَدٌ لُقْمَةً شَرًّا مِنَ اغْتِيَابِ مُؤْمِنٍ، إِنْ قَالَ فِيهِ مَا يَعْلَمُ، فَقَدِ اغْتَابَهُ، وَإِنْ قَالَ فِيهِ بِمَا لاَ يَعْلَمُ فَقَدْ بَهَتَهُ.
It is reported by Qasim bin Abdur Rahman as-Shami that he heard Ibn Unm Abd say, “If a believer is backbitten before someone and he helps the believer (by refuting backbiting) then Allah will reward him well in this world and the next. And, if a believer is backbitten before someone and he does not help him (by not refuting the backbiting) then Allah will give him a bad return for that in this world and the next. Further, if anyone does not take a morsel more than backbiting in his mouth and says that which he knows about him then he has backbitten him but if he says what he does not know about him then he has slandered him.
Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 734
Chapter 305: Chapter, Book 31: Supplication
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) defined backbiting as speaking about your fellow Muslim in a way that s/he would dislike, even if what you say is true. If what you say is false, it is even worse—it becomes slander. This really highlights the importance of guarding your tongue and it speaks volumes about the virtues of speaking kindly and truthfully about others.
Also, if you defend a believer who is being backbitten, Allah will reward you in both this life and the hereafter. But, if you fail to come to the defence of a believer being backbitten, Allah will punish you in both worlds. So, it is not only important to refrain from backbiting but we also have a duty to support and defend fellow Muslims in such situations.
Before posting or commenting, ask yourself if what you are about to say could harm someone’s reputation or feelings or slander them. If the answer is yes, it’s better to refrain. If you come across someone making statements about another Muslim that you categorically know to be untrue, then defend him or her, but do so with modesty.
The practical ways to avoid gossip, backbiting and slander includes steering clear of discussions that involve judging or speaking ill of others. Instead, get involved in uplifting and positive conversations. Remember:
وعن أبي هريرة رضي الله عنه عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: “من كان يؤمن بالله واليوم الآخر، فليقل خيرًا، أو ليصمت” ((متفق عليه)).
وهذا صريح أنه ينبغي أن لا يتكلم إلا إذا كان الكلام خيرًا، وهو الذي ظهرت مصلحته، ومتى شك في ظهور المصلحة، فلا يتكلم.Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “He who believes in Allah and the Last Day must either speak good or remain silent.” [Muslim].
Riyad as-Salihin 1511
Chapter 254: The Prohibition of Backbiting and the Commandment of Guarding one’s Tongue, Book 17: The Book of the Prohibited actions
Digital Mindfulness:
In today’s fast-paced digital world, being mindful of your online activities is really crucial. Digital mindfulness involves being aware of how much time you spend online and making sure that it doesn’t negatively impact your mental and spiritual well-being. Think about setting boundaries for your social media usage – set specific times for checking your feeds and avoid using your phone during meals or family time.
Also, taking regular social media detoxes can serve as a spiritual reboot. Use these breaks to focus on salah, reading the Quran, spending quality time with your family, or engaging in physical activities. Such practices not only improve your mental health but also strengthen your spiritual connection with Allah.
Verifying Information Before Sharing:
In an era of fake news, it’s vital that we verify information before sharing it. Spreading false information can have serious consequences and is against our deen. The Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) said:
وَعَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ: «كَفَى بِالْمَرْءِ كَذِبًا أَنْ يُحَدِّثَ بِكُلِّ مَا سمع» . رَوَاهُ مُسلم
He also reported God’s messenger as saying, “It is enough falsehood for a man to relate everything he hears.”
Mishkat al-Masabih 156
Muslim transmitted it.
Chapter 6a: Reliance on the Book and the Sunnah – Section 1, Book 1: Faith
Always cross-check the credibility of a source before passing on information. This saves you from becoming a channel for misinformation and helps maintain the integrity of your online presence.
Online Activism and Dawah:
Social media can be a great tool for positive change. As Muslim women, we can use our online presence to stand up for justice and support charitable causes, all while keeping humble and respectful. Find causes that align with our Islamic values, like helping orphans, promoting education, or speaking up for the rights of the oppressed.
There are lots of great examples of successful online campaigns led by Muslim women, showing how a dedicated group can make a big impact. Think about joining or starting initiatives that aim for social change and reflect the principles of Islam. Your voice can be a light of hope and kindness in the digital world, while being a representative of Islam and a role model.
Also using social media for dawah work can be very rewarding. Dawah (inviting others to Islam) can be done by sharing authentic content about the deen, spreading positive messages, and showing the beauty of our deen by action and reflection.
But it’s important to make sure that when committing to causes, and especially dawah, we should always aim to show kindness, patience, and respect. This reflects the true spirit our beautiful deen. Remember, whatever we do, we do it with modesty and humility, staying true to the teachings of our faith both online and offline. By doing this, we not only strengthen our own faith but also show a positive and real image of Islam to others.
Oversharing, Dealing with Negativity and Cyberbullying:
When it comes to social media, it’s important to strike a balance. If you run a business, keep it professional and refrain from sharing overly personal details. Mixing your personal life with business on social media can sometimes invite the evil eye. Protect your privacy and maintain the boundaries that contribute to your well-being and success.
Sharing Personal Life Information: Be cautious about what you share regarding your personal life. It’s natural to want to share moments of joy but, posting about your travels, new belongings, or family activities can expose you to envy and negativity. It’s not worth it. It’s wise to keep certain aspects of your life private – to safeguard your personal and spiritual well-being.
Exposing Our Belongings: Flaunting your material possessions on social media will always draw unwanted attention and even lead to security risks. Be modest, not just in appearance, but in all aspects of your life to avoid arousing jealousy and maintain a peaceful heart and mind.
By adopting these guidelines, we can navigate the complexities of social media while staying true to the deen. Unlike me who no longer uses social media, if you continue using social platforms, weigh their benefits against potential negative impacts. Know our weaknesses and identify areas you need to work on. Be honest with yourself.
When used responsibly, social media can be a platform for growth, learning, and positive change, especially for dawah work. Let your online presence be a reflection of our faith and commitment to Allah.
